My newest e-book is available!
Thriving After a Toxic Relationship: Not Just Surviving!
Chances are if you’re reading this you’ve had a relationship
with a person who greatly troubled you. Someone who turned your life upside
down and all around.
There are many labels put on persons who harm others in
non-arrestable ways: Narcissist. Sociopath. Psychopath. While there is a
definite agreement with what constitutes a narcissist, it isn’t quite so
cut-and-dried with what constitutes a sociopath versus a psychopath. The terms
are often used interchangeably.
So we will call them “toxic people.” Toxic people are not
good for us. And we’ve learned that lesson the hard way—through experience.
There will be many mini-lessons throughout this book but the
first lesson I want you to learn is this: Psychopaths, sociopaths, and
narcissists cannot be cured. They cannot be fixed. Not by the world’s best
psychiatrists. Not by love…and not by you. You cannot fix a toxic person. The only
one you can fix is you!
Isn’t that a liberating thought—you cannot fix anyone! You
can now focus on the most important person to fix—yourself!
So, you know the person is toxic. He or she cannot be fixed.
Picture a venomous snake in your mind—you cannot stop this snake from being deadly.
When you even think of “trying again” to help the toxic person, remember the
snake. If you have a snake phobia, think of something else that’s deadly toxic
and when the toxic person comes to mind, associate him/her with something
toxic. Do this each time to remind yourself to Not Touch!
A big reason, maybe the most important reason, to stop
trying to fix someone else, to stop trying to fix a relationship that has ended
is that it prevents you from fixing you. YOU are important and need attention
from yourself. Likely you’ve let yourself and your needs go for so long that
you need a lot of self-care. You will need to learn about what you need. What
makes you happy. A toxic relationship
won’t make you happy, believe me
You deserve to be happy. And you will be. It may take some
time. But once you realize that there is freedom after a toxic relationship,
you will be happier! The worst has already happened—a relationship ended badly
and you were hurt. Once you realize that the worst is over and you begin
letting the toxic person go, you can begin to heal.
Copy Julie Clark 2014. All rights reserved. Plagiarism will not be tolerated.
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